LES GENS SUR INTERNET – CYPRIEN


While old folks are pretty much the same when it comes to technology, young folks, on the other hand, well, there are many different types. Maybe you’re even one of them! On Snapchat The people who don’t have noses Whether it’s a snapchat filter, the framing, or their hand on their face In short, you will never see their whole face. If you so want to hide your face, better put this on, it’ll be much faster The spy They snap all they time without any warning, incognito Are you taking a snap now? No… But you’re meant to warn me when you’re taking a snap, not be all sneaky No, I’m not taking a snap (Phone: You’re meant to warn me when you’re taking a snap) Follow this or not? The clock It’s that one who puts the time on all their snap To show that they get up early Or go to bed very late because they are a “thug” So, I’m sorry, but this what it reminds me of: (Movie scene) One night, I remember, we went to bed at ten past midnight I swear I was so tired after that! (Mockingly) “So tired after that!” The singer So all his snaps are filled with music, they dream of being a singer, I wonder why they’re not. (Lip-syncing to “Macarena” de Damso) (Singing completely off-key) “The world will be yours and perhaps it’ll be better that way” Huh, put the music back on, please. Yeah, I think that’s for the best… (“Macarena de Damso” plays again) Don’t ruin my snaps!
(Phone: “Don’t ruin my snaps!”) And there, it’s ruined now! On twitter. So evidently, on Twitter, you’ve got the football (soccer) fan. 🎵FOOTBALL🎵 🎵My profile pic, my bio !🎵 🎵I only talk about🎵 🎵FOOTBALL FOOTBALL Football~🎵 🎵I only talk about🎵 🎵FOOTBALL FOOTBALL🎵 🎵And nothing else, and nothing else🎵 🎵(foot! foot! foot!)🎵 🎵FOOTBALL!🎵 The live tweeter It’s that one who’s gonna spend all their evening commenting on reality tv shows like Survivor, Top Chef, Dancing with the Stars… But… on Twitter. Why? Honestly, if Roger can actually last more than one minute on the post challenge… *chirp chirp chirp* 🎵If you don’t have any friend, go on Twitter! *wink*🎵 The not-very-consistent Twitter user They don’t… really spam, yeah. “Alright, I’m finally on Twitter!
How does it work?” ONE YEAR LATER “Well actually Twitter sucks, ciao.” ONE YEAR LATER “Roger can’t even last for a minute on the post challenge! #Survivor” 🎵If you don’t have any friends, go on Twitter! *wink*🎵 Oh yeah, I forgot. Of course there are those who are fans of… 🎵MANGA MANGA🎵 🎵Dragon Ball, One Piece🎵 🎵I only talk about🎵 🎵MANGA MANGA Mangaa~🎵 On Facebook The compulsive adder You meet them and four seconds later they’ve added you on Facebook. Fast ! Hi, I’m Etienne Hi, I’m Cyprien Cool. There you go, and now you tap on “Accept”. My buddy! We’re never going to leave each other from now on… Awesome! The Stalker They’ve friended you on Facebook, but they post nothing, they ‘like’ nothing, and they don’t even have a profile picture. I think that’s a spy. I see everything, I know everything… I know all about your personal life… *evil laugh* The megalomaniac He’s the one who makes that post: “Finally, I’ve gone over my friend list. If you’re reading this, you’re among the people that are close to me and that I care about…” Nope, screw off. *unfriends* Done! On Instagram The thirsty dude. You know damn well which one I’m talking about No need to explain, I think. Shit, you’re only following the hot chicks! – Ha, no no, not at all, it’s fitness. Yeah, it’s to teach you how to feel good in your body, how to gain muscle… – Yeah, basically it’s to check out asses. ‘Cause I do yoga and this has nothing to do with it – Wait, what’s her account, give me the name? – Yoga ass. The instafood If they don’t take a picture of their dish, they’re screwed. – Have you picked a dish? – What is today’s special? – Vegetarian lasagna. – No, not good. – Ah, not your thing. – It is, it is, I love it, but it doesn’t look good. What gives “likes” in your menu? – I’m gonna let you think it over, alright? – Burrata… Hashtag burrata? Hey, what color is your burrata, exactly? The hashtager Their picture sucks but, they wrote down all the imaginable hashtags. *snaps a pic* – What about #impathetic #nofriends? – Yeah, that works too. – Oh then wait, I’ve got more. So I’ve got #bigturd #iblowforlikes #mylifesucks #unemployed – Yeah that’s me. The faceless body That chick with a phone always in front of her face and takes pics in front of a mirror. You know her body, but you won’t see her face. – Wait, you’ve changed so much, I can’t even recognize you! That’s insane! – Of course, I’ve changed my phone case. – It goes very well with your eyes!
That I can’t see, but, i-if I could… – Thank you! And finally the last type of people on the internet the one that I like most, in particular. It’s.. the people who have subscribed to my Youtube channel! Are you one of them? Have you already clicked on the new Youtube button? Just in the middle, there, so you can subscribe. You have no more excuses Subtitles by: Lyswenn and Shannon:)

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